Say, right, what if you were in Bedford Street having just done a sip of a drink in

Frank's Bar and a frightened Gwen skipped up, t**tted over on the cobbles, pulled your shorts down as she fell over and reached up and smeared some Jamaican Me Crazy on the front of your pants.

Would you pull your shorts up right quick, run into Gerald's and say to the bookseller woman "Give us a cloth , you sour-faced bint" or would you lie down next to the Gwen, pull her skirts up and balance your phone on her puffy vulva?

hmmm? hmmm?

Posted By: malkybarkid on October 14th 2009 at 11:45:04

Message Thread

Say, right, what if you were in Bedford Street having just done a sip of a drink in (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 11:45:04
- vulva (n/m) (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Oct 14, 12:30:34
- I'm feeling controversial (General Chat) - camcan, Oct 14, 11:56:31
- run into Gerald's, cos am married. (n/m) (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 11:55:59
  - Would balancing a phone on her (General Chat) - duke of york, Oct 14, 11:58:46
    - Of course not, Tricky's just being silly. Marriage has nothing to do with this exercise. (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:01:19
      - if it were a cameraphone (General Chat) - camcan, Oct 14, 12:03:00
        
        No. And I tend to think balancing anything on a vulva that doesn't belong (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 12:09:19
        
        Waht if you saw a vulva on a farm track that wasn't Mrs Hawes' and the only way to save (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:11:24
        
        I guess there are times whan an unfaithful act might be justified (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 12:12:30
        
        ....so you'd let it die then? (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:14:19
        
        I'd give it the kiss of life (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Oct 14, 12:33:27
        
        I have changed my mind. I would let it die, as it is (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Oct 14, 12:39:26
        
        No. I wouldn't. (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 12:18:11
        
        Anyway, I can't believe you're trying so hard to change my mind (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 12:19:59
        
        I accept your answer, I just understand where marriage comes in. (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:21:41
        
        Good. (n/m) (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 12:41:38
        
        Neither do I (General Chat) - duke of york, Oct 14, 12:26:39
        
        lol (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:27:03
        
        *just don't understand* (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:23:04
        
        if you don't balance an acorn on them, they expire. (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:19:40
        
        ah, I meant puffy as in swollen in readiness. However, in your scenario, I would imagine (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:07:09
        
        (I was a bit surprised by camcan's interpretation of a puffy vulva, too (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 12:10:48
        
        I didn't interpret puffy at all (General Chat) - camcan, Oct 14, 12:37:16
        
        but you talked about a puff from said vulva (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Oct 14, 12:51:38
        
        oh so I did (General Chat) - camcan, Oct 14, 12:56:30
        
        vielleicht (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:12:18
- Her (General Chat) - duke of york, Oct 14, 11:54:56
  - better than a flat, old wrinkly one no? (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:00:34
    - But "puffy" gives the impression (General Chat) - duke of york, Oct 14, 12:02:59
      - or excitement - engorged with blood in readiness for nudey rub-rubs. (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:04:11
        
        Does that happen? (n/m) (General Chat) - duke of york, Oct 14, 12:07:28
        
        Yes... (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:09:37
        
        lol at the last line (General Chat) - duke of york, Oct 14, 12:15:12
    - isn't wrinkly the opposite of flat? (General Chat) - camcan, Oct 14, 12:02:01
      - I think a puffy one would have a certain tautness to it, whereas a flat one would be a bit (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 12:03:27
- Silly story cos I don't wear shorts (n/m) (General Chat) - stringersrevenge, Oct 14, 11:53:41
  - substitute the word 'trousers' or 'jeans' for 'shorts' and have another go. (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Oct 14, 11:54:32
    - Put my face next to her vulva, point at it pulling a stupid face and let some (General Chat) - stringersrevenge, Oct 14, 12:35:59
- oooh this is difficult but I would probably.. (General Chat) - Jumbo1, Oct 14, 11:50:32
- option number a, deffo (n/m) (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Oct 14, 11:48:50

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