PM Tombs some advice?

Dear Toms

The woman I love is perfect – but she’s a lesbian, and I’m a man.

I’m 28 and she’s 26. We are best mates, ­soulmates even. We met through friends four years ago and hit it off straight away.

I'm a man and had drunken romp with my lesbian best pal…
At the time, I was in a long-term relationship and although I found her attractive, I’d been told she liked women, so there wasn’t an issue.

But my relationship ended and, over the years, I started to develop strong feelings for her which became sexual.

I didn’t tell her, or anyone, and I tried to suppress them.

Meanwhile, she was in and out of bad relationships with women, which made her very unhappy. She confided her problems in me and I counselled her.

Last year, she was very upset after another fling hadn’t worked out, and I joked that maybe she’d be better off with a man.

We were both very drunk and ended up kissing, then having sex. It was everything I’d hoped it would be.

But, while she said she enjoyed it and didn’t regret it — she’d had sex with men before when she was younger — she preferred sex with women. She doesn’t think she’s bisexual.

I then confessed that I love her and want to be with her. She agreed we have a wonderful relationship and maybe she could try to make things work with me, but she didn’t want to hurt me.

She is confused about her feelings. I’ve said I’ll give her time to think about it, but I’m terrified she’ll say she’s a confirmed lesbian and can’t be with me.

People who meet us and don’t know she’s gay often remark on how well suited we are. They assume we’re a married couple.

I’m scared of losing her.

What should I do?

Oh, and any preference for a really nice rainproof jacket for autumn/winter hikes?

Posted By: Legacy Fan, Sep 28, 16:57:11