I was in a bog in O'Reilly's in Amsterdam once. I was at one urinal at one end and

some other chap was also observing etiquette and was at the urinal furthest away. Then, some bloke comes in, stands right between us, starts looking alternately at both of us and says "Alright, how's it going ? Watching the footy tonight ?". Of course I and the first bloke can't go, COS IT ISN"T RIGHT.

He then makes it worse, as he is in full flow, checking both our nobs and remarking "nothing much happening there, is there, chaps ?".

The annoying bloke finishes his piss, zips up, bids us a cheery farewell and leaves the toilet at which time of course both I and the first bloke piss no trouble at all.

And then, as I come out of the toilet, I am confronted by said t**t with a bunch of fit women, giggling.

Bastard!

Posted By: Steve in Holland on February 7th 2008 at 12:15:06

Message Thread

sounds like a pretty reasonable response to me (General Chat) - blindasabat, Feb 7, 11:45:56
- Charlie Brooker offers the following advice when troubled with urinal stage fright (General Chat) - yarmyyarmy, Feb 7, 12:34:52
  - haha, that's what I was getting at below (General Chat) - pants, Feb 7, 13:56:41
  - haha - thanks for remining me of that (n/m) (General Chat) - Brandonio, Feb 7, 12:46:43
  - nice one. Cheers. I'll give it a go (General Chat) - Small, Feb 7, 12:42:55
    - I guess you take after your username? (n/m) (General Chat) - Charles21, Feb 7, 12:48:41
      - Certainly not. Fancy a pump? (n/m) (General Chat) - Small, Feb 7, 12:50:32
        
        yes please (n/m) (General Chat) - Charles21, Feb 7, 12:54:03
- Urinal etiquette, very very important. (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 11:49:03
  - Sorry, But I Just CANNOT Go If Someone Is Standing Near Me (General Chat) - Martin Peters, Feb 7, 12:40:01
    - When I was younger and out with mates, I'd only go (General Chat) - pants, Feb 7, 12:43:07
      - That's bad for you, pants. And for your pants (n/m) (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 13:07:04
    - I have that too (General Chat) - Charles21, Feb 7, 12:42:11
  - I hate anyone being in the bog when I'm in there, it's a sacred place (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Feb 7, 12:04:42
    - Wouldn't go that far. (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 12:09:21
      - Toilet etiquette talking (General Chat) - ghostof barry butler, Feb 7, 12:32:42
      - I was in a bog in O'Reilly's in Amsterdam once. I was at one urinal at one end and (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 12:15:06
        
        hahaha, the old walking up to the toilet and talking yourself into pissing trick (General Chat) - pants, Feb 7, 12:34:01
        
        And that's a bear, not a squirrel. (n/m) (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 12:40:02
        
        You've got issues, get help. (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 12:37:15
        
        haha, it isn't every time, but there's always the chance (General Chat) - pants, Feb 7, 12:41:24
        
        I'm amazed you even understood that ! (n/m) (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 12:38:59
        
        haha, you just brought the subject up (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Feb 7, 12:40:37
        
        I meant that I have no idea if I agree with you or not because I didn't (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 12:42:11
        
        People like that should be destroyed. (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 12:17:34
        
        too right - eyes should be directed directly forward or downwards (General Chat) - phrankin, Feb 7, 12:24:47
  - Imagine ancient times. In Ostia they have 20 bogs next to each other so the Romans could (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 12:04:38
    - *Maximus* (n/m) (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 12:04:58
  - I do that..... (General Chat) - Johnny Comecardiff, Feb 7, 11:50:27
    - Happens in the King's bogs everytime I go in there (n/m) (General Chat) - Small, Feb 7, 12:01:36
      - Only to be expected in the Kings. (n/m) (General Chat) - Johnny Comecardiff, Feb 7, 12:05:59
        
        In the Kings they ONLY talk to you while you are pissing (n/m) (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 12:06:33
        
        I have problems trying to go when it happens... (General Chat) - Small, Feb 7, 12:11:39
        
        Which Terry was it? (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Feb 7, 12:22:20
        
        young Terry. Curly haired Terry's quite a nice bloke int ee? (n/m) (General Chat) - Small, Feb 7, 12:32:20
        
        do you mean wet-look Terry? (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Feb 7, 12:36:10
        
        yes. There's three isn't there? (n/m) (General Chat) - Small, Feb 7, 12:39:18
        
        Are these Terrys all Nutkinses? (n/m) (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 12:37:38
        
        Yessum - I know of three, not sure which one is 'curly-haired Terry' though. (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Feb 7, 12:38:49
        
        He's Biggests' mate. Popular with the ladies. (n/m) (General Chat) - Small, Feb 7, 12:40:26
        
        Terry Originalis - Terry Number One. He is a bit of a ladies man - I think he knows (General Chat) - malkybarkid, Feb 7, 12:43:51
        
        terry towling (n/m) (General Chat) - strap_on sally, Feb 7, 12:29:06
        
        Terry Towelling ? (n/m) (General Chat) - Steve in Holland, Feb 7, 12:28:09
    - It's disturbing, it's very very worrying. (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 11:51:48
      - Hope it wasn't you who approached me (General Chat) - CB41, Feb 7, 11:56:08
        
        You were sixteen in 1842 though, when I wasn't even a twitch in the milkman's bollock. (n/m) (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Feb 7, 11:58:18
        
        I hate being kicked in the nuts a shard (n/m) (General Chat) - Johnny Comecardiff, Feb 7, 12:05:19
      - Well, yes..... (General Chat) - Johnny Comecardiff, Feb 7, 11:54:58
      - was talking about this yesterday... (General Chat) - Brandonio, Feb 7, 11:54:46

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