Alternative, for old times' sake

Toss off some pancetta, throw in three badger stools, the tears of a f**king lark, the fourth and seventy-third longest hairs in the tail of a grey stallion, four f**king quarts of water, two lemons, an over-ripe plum, a goldfish and five melons. Do the shake'n'vac and put the freshness back, and clean right round the bend - even at today's low temperatures.

Then open a new bottle of your fourth best filthy slut olive oil, carefully place your lips round the top and then invert the bottle, drinking it down in one. While you wait for the inevitable vomiting and weeks of oily s**ts, pop down Budgens and get a jar of Hartley's. You little tiger!

Posted By: Jamie Oliver on July 23rd 2007 at 14:01:06

Message Thread

Gordon Brown on the news explaining about the fludds (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 13:50:37
- Can he explain where little babies come from as well - I've always wondered that (n/m) (NCFC) - Partial Angler, Jul 23, 14:03:53
  - same place as big one's (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:07:23
  - Bristol (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:06:01
    - lol (n/m) (NCFC) - Steve in Holland, Jul 23, 14:08:14
- The 15 million quid removed from the flood budgets... (NCFC) - Jono, Jul 23, 13:54:02
  - I believe you may be wrong as I think the budget for capital work (NCFC) - Commisar_Canary, Jul 23, 14:45:39
  - two typos in one post. (NCFC) - Jono, Jul 23, 13:59:41
  - if it was £15 billion you were talking about, you might be right (n/m) (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 13:57:54
    - which is significantly less than the government stupid tax has raised for good causes (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:02:44
      - the Stupid Tax has created far more millionaires (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:08:21
        
        I would think that the war has created far more secure jobs (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:12:42
        
        Bit like 9/11 then (n/m) (NCFC) - pants, Jul 23, 14:25:23
        
        it's these secure jobs that have lead to people being able to pay ridiculous sums (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:16:00
        
        how much is a ridiculous sum? (n/m) (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:17:04
        
        220k as an average house price ? (NCFC) - Steve in Holland, Jul 23, 14:21:58
        
        9 (n/m) (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:18:27
        
        nice tap in (n/m) (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:19:42
        
        So basically we're coming to a board consensus: more war, fewer steady jobs (n/m) (NCFC) - Partial Angler, Jul 23, 14:16:55
        
        no no no, more war more jobs (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:19:02
        
        and those that can't afford to get enter the housing market (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:27:14
        
        I think the term, in the new (NCFC) - CB41, Jul 23, 14:32:15
        
        I'm well pissed off (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:37:20
        
        Just for Comrade Canary, my first ROFL (n/m) (NCFC) - Commisar_Canary, Jul 23, 14:47:10
        
        'cept we're no longer in Thatcher's Britain (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:35:12
        
        not at all, they can all koo up and live in ex married quarters (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:30:21
        
        People *did* coo up for the ex-forces quarters in Norwich (NCFC) - Arizona Bay, Jul 23, 14:34:38
        
        incredible (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:39:07
        
        they was all camping out for weeks beforehand (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:38:03
        
        So it was nothing to do with (NCFC) - Steve in Holland, Jul 23, 14:43:53
        
        like CB41's about to do? (NCFC) - blindasabat, Jul 23, 14:48:31
        
        they are escaping to Spain (n/m) (NCFC) - Commisar_Canary, Jul 23, 14:48:15
        
        eastern europe (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:55:56
        
        I'd imagine the war created more (n/m) (NCFC) - Steve in Holland, Jul 23, 14:10:22
  - they have a flood budget? (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 13:56:00
- What's he explaining? (NCFC) - Yellalee, Jul 23, 13:52:34
  - bout keeping power stations running and emergency services and how to make jam (n/m) (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 13:54:45
    - Loads of fruit, oodles of sugar, boil it up, add gelatine. (NCFC) - Arizona Bay, Jul 23, 13:56:41
      - Alternative, for old times' sake (NCFC) - Jamie Oliver, Jul 23, 14:01:06
        
        lol (n/m) (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 14:03:55
      - there really isn't any further use for the Prime Minister (NCFC) - Tomblander, Jul 23, 13:58:45

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