Do you have satnav?

If not, get one asap of ebay or whatever.
You'll have to accept the penalty/points etc but photocopy all the docs and send them to whoever the maker of your satnav is and say the jist of this

"Dear Cunts at Garmin (change to suit brand)

Your fuggen talking map is absolute s**t. I was using the latest version to navigate Plymouth, a town I'm not familiar with AT ALL hence trusting 110% the supposed elite navigational device, and it fuggen send me down a fuggen bus lane, and I've got pulled for it.

Please reimburse me to the tune of (insert total of fines, points, insurance increase etc) as you've f**ked up here, not me.

Fuming here.

Cheltenham Canary"

Posted By: MIKEWALKER on December 10th 2012 at 11:09:18

Message Thread

FUCK IT. just been done ?60 for driving in a bus lane in plymuff. (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 10:58:28
- Just put it on expenses like all reps - job done. (n/m) (General Chat) - CB41, Dec 10, 11:25:56
  - Or don't drive in bus lanes? (n/m) (General Chat) - Brom, Dec 10, 11:36:40
    - That's a silly suggestion (n/m) (General Chat) - Old Man, Dec 10, 11:56:59
  - no can do I'm afraid. (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 11:28:20
    - Put ?30s worth of some thing else on expenses then (n/m) (General Chat) - CB41, Dec 10, 11:30:46
      - FFS! I'm ALREADY claiming for a second residence in Chelsea, so might be bit over the top. (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 11:33:22
- Do you have satnav? (General Chat) - MIKEWALKER, Dec 10, 11:09:18
  - You're meant to use your brain when driving a car, even when using a satnav (General Chat) - scruffy, Dec 10, 12:47:40
  - Articulate. (General Chat) - I Am Hoot, Dec 10, 11:22:07
  - excellent....... (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 11:11:21
    - I'd reword the bit about 110% reliance though (General Chat) - essexcanaryOTBC, Dec 10, 11:13:25
  - also send the sat nav device in the envelope too (General Chat) - MIKEWALKER, Dec 10, 11:10:53
- idiot. (n/m) (General Chat) - I Am Hoot, Dec 10, 11:04:18
  - Do what this chap did (General Chat) - essexcanaryOTBC, Dec 10, 11:15:40
  - fuck off! If i'm gahn dahn, I'm taking YOU with me! I'll tell them "he told me to!". (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 11:13:47
    - I'm innocent guv, its all you, pwopa nawty type. (n/m) (General Chat) - I Am Hoot, Dec 10, 11:20:46
- Were you driving a bus though? (General Chat) - essexcanaryOTBC, Dec 10, 11:02:24
  - he could say he was in a bus disguised as a car (General Chat) - SCC 28, Dec 10, 11:03:56
    - I was driving a passenger.... (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 11:08:06
      - I think that's a rock solid defence tbh (General Chat) - essexcanaryOTBC, Dec 10, 11:11:57
- do you want one of us to post something sanctimonious about how you shouldn't (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, Dec 10, 11:01:29
  - yes please..... (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 11:07:22
    - "... dont want to get bum-raped in the showers ..." - dincha like it the first time then? (n/m) (General Chat) - CB41, Dec 10, 11:29:16
      - No. It smarted a bit. (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Dec 10, 11:31:19

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