Well

a marriage expresses commitment because it involves a public promise. Standing up in front of all your friends and family and saying "This is us, we love each other, we intend to stick together for always". It's not about the legal relationship at all. It's about having such a strong commitment to each other that you are prepared to make that public statement.

As opposed to "Well we've been living together for six months/a couple of years/five years/had a baby/had two babies so I suppose we're together now"

If you feel totally committed to someone, why NOT say so in public with a celebration?

Nine out of ten cohabs split up. Five out of ten cohabs WITH CHILDREN split up (as opposed to 1 in 12 or so marriages). Shit as the divorce rate is, it isn't that bad!

Posted By: Old Git on July 14th 2009 at 10:54:28

Message Thread

Right, a propos the thread kicked off by OG t'other day, I have decided (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:15:49
- This is "my current sexual partner, to whom I am insufficiently committed to get married"? (n/m) (General Chat) - Old Git, Jul 14, 10:40:35
  - How does not marrying suggest lack of committment? (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:46:40
    - Well (General Chat) - Old Git, Jul 14, 10:54:28
      - **marriage enhances the fabric of society (General Chat) - Tombs, Jul 14, 10:59:27
      - But I have done all that in the past. I do not and am not co-habiting (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:56:51
        
        Ah, a non cohab relationship? (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:57:54
        
        100% chance in the next 30 years I'd have guessed (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 11:00:16
      - There you go DNB - you've only a 1 in 10 chance (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:56:11
        
        I've done heartache - that's probably why. (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:59:39
    - Don't get OG on to God... (n/m) (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:47:23
      - Ah. If he's a GB then that is a totally different case and I apolgise for any offence. (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:50:48
        
        There probably is no god so stop worrying and enjoy your life (n/m) (General Chat) - Tombs, Jul 14, 10:52:43
        
        wtf does god have to do with getting married? (n/m) (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:51:58
        
        god knows (n/m) (General Chat) - Tombs, Jul 14, 10:55:55
        
        It doesn't exclusively but Believers will be far more likely to marry (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:54:52
        
        God thinks it's "a good thing" (n/m) (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:54:31
        
        Ah, like Hurricanes, Pestilence and war? (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:57:43
        
        and celebrity big brother, x factor, russell brand, chris moyles, tennis, ipswich (General Chat) - Tombs, Jul 14, 11:01:34
  - Ma bitch? (n/m) (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:41:05
    - prefer "me flaps" (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:44:18
- You're up north now, it's "our lass" (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Jul 14, 10:30:16
  - *cringe* - sounds like something out of coronation street! (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:33:16
    - I'll have to take your word for that. Don't you have to be pretty old to (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:38:34
      - i like Corrie (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:41:09
        
        There is one excuse and one excuse alone that is acceptable for watching Corrie. (General Chat) - sheffieldcanary, Jul 14, 11:11:12
        
        prefer this 'un (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 11:13:06
        
        Do you mean it's still on?? Christ it's older than telly, isn't it? (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:45:01
        
        Mollie looks like a troll (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:43:44
    - haha, another fine chelts sneer at the underclasses (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Jul 14, 10:36:50
      - not really a class thing, more of a dirty norvern bastard thing! (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:45:39
        
        until it isn't :) (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Jul 14, 10:46:22
        
        I think we need to make allowances for Chelts myopia Pants. (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:49:38
        
        oh please! just becuase you're IN the north, doesnt mean you have to talk like one! (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:56:17
        
        I'm not in the north, I'm near Ely (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:58:09
        
        arent you moving up north at some point tho? (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 11:03:15
        
        I go to my new house on Fridays and come back to Fengibbon land on Monday (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 11:06:54
        
        fort you were getting a new job up there to move there full time? (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 11:13:48
        
        Yep, starting to look now. I wanted to get one trauma over first. (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 11:17:09
        
        untill it the term spreads across the country? (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:48:36
  - Shitsticks, I forgot that Pants. How do I distinguish though between her and (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:32:12
    - kids need nicknames, like nugget, or trouble, or their name :) (General Chat) - pants, Jul 14, 10:34:05
      - "our lass" is someting a leeds fan would say! (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:50:17
    - because your duaghter would be "Our nameofdaughter" (n/m) (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:32:39
      - Correct. "Our lass" only refers to a male's fuckbunny. (General Chat) - sheffieldcanary, Jul 14, 10:34:45
        
        Ok, my lass it is then, especially as she was originally a Sheffield girl. (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:36:41
        
        Is "lass" any better than "girlfriend" in the chronological context? (General Chat) - Old Git, Jul 14, 10:44:11
        
        That is exactly what it is. (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:47:19
        
        "Lass" in the north does transcend age, exactly as "boy" does in Norfolk. (n/m) (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Jul 14, 10:45:41
        
        what about Scotchland? (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:53:08
        
        "Hen" isn't it? (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:58:44
        
        Yes, hence my question (n/m) (General Chat) - Old Git, Jul 14, 10:55:02
        
        The definitive guide to Northern etiquette (n/m) (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:36:11
      - Ah. That rather f***s up my suggestion of "my Julie" then, dunt it. (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:34:43
- I use wife even though we're not married. (General Chat) - APB, Jul 14, 10:30:13
  - I still get confused with the wife thing in gay couples though (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:32:00
    - I'm clearly not moving in the right circles. (General Chat) - APB, Jul 14, 10:33:32
      - post civil-partnership (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:35:20
- you may refer to her as your partner, however... (n/m) (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:21:14
  - I'm sure that will be the case. It's all part of the (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:30:53
- I hate 'partner' (n/m) (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:16:29
  - Yes I do too (although it's not as bad as the oh so pretentious "life partner") (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:19:55
  - Would "little lady" be better? (n/m) (General Chat) - sheffieldcanary, Jul 14, 10:17:10
    - They're all shit really (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:18:51
      - Mmm, although of all the reasons I have heard for getting married, that's the weirdest. (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:22:52
        
        I wouldn't make it a reason to marry, just a post-nuptial advantage (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:25:35
        
        List some more please. (n/m) (General Chat) - sheffieldcanary, Jul 14, 10:31:48
        
        The knowledge of having commited to someone, and them having committed to you too (n/m) (General Chat) - Old Git, Jul 14, 10:41:26
        
        I feel quite teary (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:43:15
        
        same here (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:49:32
        
        Mine was totally non messy, although a bit painfull initially, (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:53:02
        
        well yes, but if you split from your fuckbuddy i'm sure the lack of a piece of paper isn't (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:54:46
        
        or even physically (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:56:36
        
        It costs money that could be spent on "things" (n/m) (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:47:02
        
        doesn't need to (n/m) (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:49:52
        
        Free weddings? Where? (n/m) (General Chat) - duke of york, Jul 14, 10:56:32
        
        The legal bit is around three hundred pounds I think (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 11:03:33
        
        (sheds, a new roof, green house, getting rid of the leylendii, carpets, kitchen) (n/m) (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, Jul 14, 10:47:49
        
        inheritance tax rules (n/m) (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:37:22
        
        I was struggling on that one. Mind you, she is still very much a novice, (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:33:25
        
        I love being married (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:37:34
        
        24-hour happiness (n/m) (General Chat) - camcan, Jul 14, 10:33:09
        
        lol (n/m) (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:32:23
      - "Better half" is especially cringeworthy. Northerners have it well... "our Shaneece" etc (General Chat) - sheffieldcanary, Jul 14, 10:20:52
      - her about the female other half being referred to as.... (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:20:44
      - Ok, how about her name. It's Julie. (n/m) (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:20:30
        
        Your Julie, My Julie etc. Excellent... distinguishes her from other peoples' Julies (n/m) (General Chat) - sheffieldcanary, Jul 14, 10:22:10
        
        My Julie it is then. (General Chat) - DNB41, Jul 14, 10:25:24
        
        You would risk it being misheard as Toad Girl. Just a thought. (n/m) (General Chat) - sheffieldcanary, Jul 14, 10:38:04
        
        "me julie" (General Chat) - Cheltenham_Canary, Jul 14, 10:21:17
        
        you'll have to explain who Ali G is, me thinks... (n/m) (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, Jul 14, 10:22:40

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