My match report

The fitness coach is f**king hooooge! (Dont think it was the main one). He looks like Doherty after he has been retired 20 years, owned a pub, and drunk the profits.

His fitness routines made me laugh though - making the players sway and stretch in twos, all with the backdrop medley of music such as McFly and S Club 7. Made oi larf.

20 secs - 1-0. Chadders cuts a ball back from right, defender helpfully puts the ball in.

3 mins - 2-0. Chav Martin cuts in from left, Henry-esque, drills it in top right. He has lost a bit of timber, but still hangs around with Spillane.

13 mins - 2-1. Spillane mis-places a pass, then is caught out of position in the resulting attack. Had a touch of the Shackell's (would people please refrain etc etc)

31 mins - 3-1. Pattison hits a 20 yard bobbler into bottom right. Still looks like a cross between a bouncer and Geaorge Dawes.

38 mins - 4-1. "He's a Baby" hits a shot from 35yds, Daley catches it, then drops it, turns, and puts it in from 15yds.

45mins - 5-1. Chadders, right hand channel again, pulls it back on the byline for Chav Martin to hit a 2 yard screamer.

HT - looods of subs.

48 mins - 6-1. Wes wins pen in left hand channel. Manny Richardson slots it home, bottom left. Wes wanted it, then remembered he was the new boy.

51 mins - 7-1. Hoolahan dribbles into area and passes to Russell 12 yards out. Scores bottom left.

75 mins - 8-1. Fucking great goal. Darren who? Wes dribbles from just inside their half, one two's with, ahem, someone, then gets it back, and dribbles around keeper to slot home from 1 yd. Defender clobbers him about 3 hours later, just for daring to do it.

FT.

One or two ratings

Wes. I f**king love him. Always wants it, then when he has it, he uses it. Looks for the ball into the channel all the time for the striker. Doubt he'll get to the byline for many crosses. Expect the moaners to say we have no width on the left though....

Clingan - Commanding, efficient use of the ball. He's bigger than I thought he was.

Martin - played well, still watches the game a bit though.

Daley - f**k he quick bor.

Chadders - impressive, as always.

Posted By: Yellalee, Jul 16, 22:36:28