Former Rangers and Norwich City failure Ian Murray, 26, has moved to clarify his recent statement that playing for Norwich City stopped being "fun" when Glenn Roeder took over the struggling Norfolk clubs.
Murray's comments sparked mild irritation amongst a number of contemptuous Norwich supporters, who withdrew their thanks for Murray's numerous unforgettable performances in the hallowed yellow shirt.
"Football fans don't understand football, and are flids", said non-entity Murray. "Professional footballers don't enjoy winning. In fact it makes them feel physically sick.
"When you join a football team, your job is to antagonise its fans as thoroughly as possible, and then to make sanctimonious, incoherent responses through the local press when they barrack you.
"Of course, you can annoy them through ill-advised interviews, but above all, the most fun you can have is by losing games.
"Roeder doesn't get this, but Peter Grant really understood it. He realised that the best way for us to enjoy our football was not only to go game after game without winning, but without even scoring - you won't find a single professional footballer who likes scoring goals, despite what you f**kwads who pay £25 a time to watch me 'play' might think."
Murray left Norwich during the January transfer window as Norwich embarked upon a 12-game unbeaten run.
"The unbeaten run was s**t," said Murray. "After the game, we'd all sit down, ashen-faced, and ask each other, "How do you start losing?" But Roeder just couldn't find a way. He smells of poo."
Murray's agent desperately tried to engineer a move to Derby County during the transfer window, only for it to fall through when Derby manager Paul Jewell called him a "talentless, self-righteous dweeb."
Murray has since re-joined Hibs, but remembers his time at Rangers under the hapless Paul Le Guen very fondly.
"Paul managed to build the worst Rangers team since the early Eighties," said Murray with a t**t-faced smile. "It was brilliant. The only thing better than playing in a poor team that never scores is playing in a big team that's wildly underachieving. Their fans go mental, it's everything you dream of when you're kicking a ball about in your garden when you're ten."
Posted By: The Scottish News, Feb 9, 14:56:30
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