That's not very hard though, is it....

Good morning ladies and gentlemen and welcome to 'one', the only rail service operating between Norwich and London. We will be taking the longest route to the capital possible, calling at Diss, Stowmarket, Ipswich, Manningtree, Colchester, Chelmsford, Shenfield, Stratford, due to arrive at London Liverpool Street in approximately two hours. A word of warning, we will be delayed because a f**koff freight train will be ahead of us, or it will be too hot so our speed will be restricted, so better say three or four hours just to be safe.

Our s**tty buffet car will be serving s**tty goods, including offal in a bap, weak tea and coffee, and warm beer.

I would like to remind you that coach B is a quiet coach, so please ignore and carry on listening to that ipod and use your mobile as much as you like.

We would like to thank you for using this service today, thanks for the £70 and enjoy your journey.

Cunts.

Posted By: Stoopish, Apr 16, 12:02:00