A family walks into a talent agency. It?s a father, mother, teenage daughter and dog.

The dog has a little dog tutu on ? and a pointy clown hat. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really great act. We?d like you to represent us."

The agent says, "Sorry, I don?t represent family acts. They?re a little too old-fashioned."

The mother says, "If you would please see our act, we know you would like us."

The agent says, "Okay, let me see what you do."

The father hoists his wife and daughter up ? one on each shoulder ? the daughter farts on the way up. The agent sees that the wife?s panties have a rusty-coloured stain. The dog obediently runs out and sits in front of the human pyramid, in the centre of the line.

The dad says, "On the count of three ? one, two? three!"

The daughter and mom begin singing "On the Good Ship Lollipop."

"On the gooood ship lol-EE-pop?"

And as the family sing together, the clown dog does a little dance on its hind legs. The agent sees a little glistening bubblegum-coloured phallus on the dog.

"?it?s a sweeeet trip to the can-DEE shop? ? where bob-bons play?"

The dog poops on the floor in front of the agent?s desk.

"? on the sunny beach of peppermint bay?"

The mom & daughter somersault off the dad?s shoulders ? he accidentally belches and poops his pants from the heavy lifting.

"Lemonade stands, everywhere crackerjack bands, fill the air and there you are, happy landings on a chocolate bar?"

The daughter slips on the dog poop and lands on her back on the agent?s desk with her dress over the agent?s head. She then farts. The dog takes a pee on the agent?s desk.

The mom & dad continue singing:

"See the sugar bowl do a tootsie roll in a big bad devils food cake, if you eat too much? oh, oh, you?ll awake, with a tummy ache."

The agent decides to perform cunnilingus on the girl since his head is up her dress. He can?t help himself.

" On the good ship lollipop its a nice trip, in to bed you hop, and dream away, on the good ship lollipop."

Seeing the agent do this turns on the mom & dad. Dad continues singing while mom puts his penis into her mouth and bobs up and down on it. The dog is under the agent?s desk ? humping his leg.

Eventually the daughter comes on the agent?s face, the dog comes on the agent?s leg and the dad comes in the mother?s mouth. The agent has masturbated to completion.

The agent just sits in silence for a long time. Finally, he manages, "That?s a hell of an act. What do you call yourselves?"

And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

Posted By: pants, Dec 4, 17:16:47