FAO CB41 and the arse-bandits

Haregoo. Rather good translation, this. Poem caused me no end of amusement as a schoolboy. "no woman on her back can ever be naked enough" is an absolutely brilliant line.

XI:104

Uxor, vade foras aut moribus utere nostris:
non sum ego nec Curius nec Numa nec Tatius.
Me jucunda juvant tractae per pocula noctes:
tu properas pota surgere tristis aqua.
Tu tenebris gaudes: me ludere teste lucerna
et juvat admissa rumpere luce latus.
Fascia te tunicaeque obscuraque pallia celant:
at mihi nulla satis nuda puella jacet.
basia me capiunt blandas imitata columbas:
tu mihi das aviae qualia mane soles.
Nec motu dignaris opus nec voce juvare
nec digitis, tamquam tura merumque pares:
masturbabantur Phrygii post ostia servi,
Hectoreo quotiens sederat uxor equo,
et quamvis Ithaco stertente pudica solebat
illic Penelope semper habere manum.
Pedicare negas: dabat hoc Cornelia Graccho,
Julia Pompeio, Porcia, Brute, tibi;
dulcia Dardanio nondum miscente ministro
pocula Juno fuit pro Ganymede Jovi.
Si te delectat gravitas, Lucretia toto
sis licet usque die: Laida nocte volo.

Either get out of the house or conform to my tastes, woman.
I'm no strait-laced old Roman.
I like prolonging the nights agreeably with wine:
you, after one glass of water
rise and retire with an air of hauteur.
You prefer darkness: I enjoy love-making
with a witness- a lamp shining or the dawn breaking.
You wear bed-jackets, tunics, thick woollen stuff,
whereas I think no woman on her back can ever be naked enough.
I love girls who kiss like doves and hang around my neck:
You give me the sort of peck
due to your grandmother as a morning salute.
In bed, you're motionless, mute
Not a wriggle, not a giggle,
as solemn as a priestess at a shrine
proffering incence and pure wine.
Yet every time Andromache went for a ride
in Hector's bedroom, the household slaves used to masturbate outside:
Even modest Penelope, when Ulysses snored,
kept her hand on the sceptre of her lord.
You refuse to be buggered; but it's a known fact
that Graccus', Pompey's and Brutus' wives were willing partners in the act,
and that before Ganymede mixed Jupiter his tasty bowl
Juno filled the dear boy's role.
If you want to be uptight- all right,
by all means play Lucretia by day. But I need a La?s at night.

Posted By: Old Git, Nov 30, 12:02:43