Moly

Curran 'Ave A Go If You Think Gerrard Enough!

A very reliable mole has floated a somewhat disturbing story.

It might seem to indicate that the captain of an English footy club has a penchant for troublesome women.

Steven Gerrard's most famous previous relationship was with the tiny-headed and in-no-way-ridiculously-breasted Jennifer Ellison (who has had the front of her house shot to s**t by passing gangsters - a fact totally unrelated to her current and very, very pleasant boyfriend).

A mole has been in touch to say...

"The real reason Scouse footballer has apparently thrown his missus out was because he was approached with a mobile phone video of her getting nailed by two guys in the Newz bar toilets.

They said they wanted ?11 million or they were going to the press. This confirmed his suspicion that his bird was taking cock from anything that moved and may not even be the biological father of his kids."

Holy Moly would like to state on the record that there is no scrap of evidence to support these claims, but they are everywhere. Absolutely f**king everywhere. Even my mum asked me, and she thinks football is a kind of fruit.

My two-penneth? Who f**king cares. Footballers are thick and rich - a deadly combination.

Posted By: Arizona Bay, Nov 3, 12:53:40