Preposterous tales in the life of Ken Mackenzie.

"Hello, Ken! what can I get you? That's two light bitters then. Before you start, Ken, let's keep it clean.

I went out with a famous DJ's sister's friend,
I was on Crackerjack at the age of ten (oh really?)
And I saw the Sex Pistols play down the Hundred Club (yeah, we all did)
And I spent New Year's Eve at Sensible's Den.

Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken Mackenzie,
Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken Mackenzie.

Well, you're drinking fast tonight, Ken. Well I've been a bit off my beer since you gave me that homebrew. What did you put inside it? Neat alcohol? I like a strong beer, Ken, but that was ridiculous.

I lost a thousand pounds playing brag last night (come off it, Ken),
I flew to Amsterdam to start a riot (oh really?)
And I once saw the Palace score four goals away from home (oh yeah?)
And I've won every game of Trivial Pursuit I've ever played (you've never played me, Ken)

Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales in the pub with Ken Mackenzie,
Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales (now then, now then),
Preposterous tales in the life of Ken Mackenzie.

Same old stories, eh Ken? Ken's drinking heavily again. Nothing changes. Is it my round again? I thought I got the last. How much money did you bring out with you? I've got me cashpoint card if necessary. If necessary?! So come on, let's have some more yarns.

I once ate six Mars bars in half a hour (did you Ken?),
While working on a site I unearthed a bomb (oh didy you Ken?),
And I once had a shower with two American girls,
(What, at the same time, Ken? Ah, that's preposterous!)"

Thank you, SHINDIG, for introducing me to things like this. To quote Billy Madison, "I am now stupider for having heard it."

Posted By: pants, Aug 25, 12:01:01