Flew on one back in ’72 as part of Operation Linebacker II in North Vietnam.

Me and Matt (Rosie) Balls were seconded to Strategic Air Command, helping maintain their fleet of B-52s, mainly upholstery work but sometimes we were asked to check the depth of the tread on the big, fat tyres.

On the 18 December, Rosie and I were rudely awoken at 04.30 to join the Yanks in a Black Op, codenamed Operation Sexy Blancmange. We had been out in Guam the night before and got absolutely planked on a heady mix of Cambodian spleen and s**tpips. Rosie had swamped his pit and had a rash.

We were to target the airfields at Kép, Phúc Yên and Hòa Lạc. As we flew over Xuan Hoa, the pilot had to bank sharply to avoid a flock of Rufous Treepies. Rosie was so in the weeds, he fell out, right over Phuc Yen.

He was found in a field in Minh Phu in 1987 by a tiny, Swedish blacksmith.

He was living inside a hollowed out Bodhi Tree with a Buff-cheeked gibbon. Rosie's penis was nailed to the inside of the tree trunk and the gibbon was wearing a pair of Birmingham Bags.

Posted By: malkybarkid, Feb 5, 14:17:24