I've always liked this one...

"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"

Posted By: Fierce Panda, Jun 15, 14:38:01

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So I went out for a meal last night...
Posted By: yarmyyarmy, Jun 15, 14:40:00
18
I had a mate who was addicted to brake fluid but he said he could stop at any time
Posted By: pants, Jun 15, 14:39:25

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