Was you're away trip anything like this? ....

I'm so envious, I'd really love to go and watch the Canaries play away. It must be so exciting! Boarding an omnibus with a dozen crates of light ale, the aromatic nutty smell of 'Old Holborn pipe baccy'.....rustlin' of yellow & green rosettes, waving of hand knitted scarves and the 'clickety clackety whirr' whirring' of various football rattles. The social chattering, raised voices and loud guffaws, coupled with occasional stops at hedgerow lay-bys, allowing the 'slack bladders' to relieve themselves. Humbugs, peardrops and fishermans' friends, handed around to the sweet toothed supporter's amongst us......

Arriving at the away ground, disembarking from the omnibus, to good natured catcalls and jeers from the gaberdine, flat cap and mackintosh wearing opposition fans. Through the rickety turnstiles, and straight to the refreshment shed, "a mug of bovril and a packet of ready salted please darlin'!" Then, scaling the steep steps up to the terrace to purchase a 4 page programme from the 'ole boy' hobbling around the ground perimeter. Tension mounts! Then the players' trot out onto the pitch, "hoorah! hoorah! and thrice hoorah!" the crowd yell! Tossing of the coin, and they're away!

"Peep! Peep!" signals a welcome halftime, my balloon bladder's fit to burst, I hustle & bustle and shove my way into the walled - but roofless, tin trough urinals, steam rising from the ooh's and aah's of the more desperate! Time for a quick cuppa - then, return to the terrace and the 2nd half....... "Peep! Peep!" from the busy refs' 'ACME thunderer' whistle, announcing to the watching and chilled to the bone seasoned faithful, that its now fulltime, unfortunately, it only produced a boring 0-0 scoreline......Muted applause, as the players traipse off the pitch. Then, we stream like lemmings - out through the big rusting and barbed wire covered corrugated 12 foot gates.

Leaping onto the homeward bound 'chariot of snarlin' death!' The light ale crates are full of empties!?......Soon, the less savoury of my fellow fans, are in the 'land of nod,' grunting, snoring, farting, wheezing and belching. Just the one unscheduled stop for the toilet, and hopefully a small portion of fish & six. It's just another hour or so on the road, then the driver calls out: "we're home!"! Straight off the ramshackle transport, gladly relieved of its cargo of stale flatulating beer sodden breathed individuals ......I wrap my scarf tightly around neck, put my coat collar up, then pull my tweed cap snugly over my ears and forehead. A brisk short walk home, remove my outdoor attire, amble into my living room warmed by a blazing coal fire. Then, I collapse fatigued into an armchair, clutching a steaming mug of cocoa, and a chunky doorstep slice of jam 'n' bread........Ahhhh! If I could only just attend an away game........it must be great fun! Still, there'll always be a first time, and maybe then, I can be classed as a 'true supporter!" OTBC ;~)

Posted By: meeky, Mar 13, 10:58:28