Samba v Sprouts World Cup knockers out stage eliminatorthon Quattrofinale

"it could have been us" etc

eth eth eth eth eth eth eth eth chrissy woddle schminky pinky hang on to your ten gallon hats footballs coming to the favela, footballs coming to the favela or will the belly belgiumeezers take the manneken pis and have too much for the Copa Cabanaboys and knock them clean sprout of the competition? Place your Roubles and let's get this party started with the most anticipated game of the evening.

It's Brazil v Belgiums at the Novichok Arena in Kazan wherever the f**k that is, somewhere in Russia I guess east of Lowestoft. The winners get to take on France, which is Nice.

Let's have a shufty at the Belgians first with deference to the order of the alphabet. By far and away the tastiest attacking team in the tournament take on the tightest arsed defence of the brazzillions.

don't expect a f**ktonne of goalazzos tonight they won't be whomping, pinging, flicking and traction engining them from all over the park no sirree bob. Unless they do then I claim my five textbooks.

All of the Belgian side ply their trade in the Barclays Premiership sponsored by Eon or whoever so you will all be familiar with Kevin the Browner and Mario Hair et al

Looking forward to some epic skills from everyone's favourite little f**ker Neymar, or to use his full name
Neymar da Silva Santos Shithouse Júnior.

Brazillion MF Casemero is suspendered for this clash so, he's not playing so Fernandinho will be tasked with clogging De Bruyne.

Brazil are the slight favourites but it could all go down the the penalty of lotterys.

Brazil Facts

The only country in the world named after a nut.

São Vicente, near Sao Paulo, is the oldest city in Brazil and was Portugal’s first permanent settlement in the Americas. Established in 1532, it is the birthplace of footballer Robinho.

Brazils national dish is Steak & Kidney pie a throwback to Sir Walter Raleigh who discover Brazil by mistake when he was looking for Potatoes in 1502.

Brazil forcibly imported African slaves in a large number (estimated between 3 and 4 million.) Due to the importation of a large number of slaves from African nations, there was a great mix of population of indigenous Brazilians, the Portuguese, and the African slaves. Moreover, the arrival of immigrants from Asia, Europe, and the Middle East led to the miscegenation of these people from various origins. Hence, Brazil became a culturally diverse nation.

The world’s largest population of Catholics (73.6%) lives in Brazil. They make up 64% of its population

Visitors to Brazil are treated with utmost respect and are admired. Brazilians have the reputation of being one of the most hospitable people in the world (after the French)

Brazil also has the largest number of Japanese people outside Japan

It is a ritual in Brazil for boys to bear the pain from Bullet Ants before they are declared adults. Their hands are put in gloves filled with these ants. Boys are required to withstand the pain for at least 10 minutes, and they have to pass this test 20 times before being declared adults.

*selects reverse* Hangonner a minute! 😳 Care to run that by me again?

Sure, "It is a ritual in Brazil for boys to bear the pain from Bullet Ants before they are declared adults. Their hands are put in gloves filled with these ants. Boys are required to withstand the pain for at least 10 minutes, and they have to pass this test 20 times before being declared adults"

So, erm Neymar eh? How'd he get on with that then?

Oscar Niemeyer designed the capital city of Brasilia. It resembles the shape of an airplane when viewed from the air

Non chocolate Belgian Facts

Cricket was invented in Belgium

Brussels South Charleroi Airport is the most punctual airport in Europe

Belgian men are the second tallest in the world

Belgians are accredited to inventing the Body Mass Index (BMI), the saxaphone, plastic and opposable thumbs.

Belgium holds a world record for castles – Belgium has more castles per kilometre than any other country in the world.

Belgium is the world's leading exporter of billiard balls and Toucan beak polish

That's the interesting Belgium barrel all scraped, I'm out of here like a car bonnet. Enjoy the game and drink responsibly.

kom op Belgie! 🇧🇪

Posted By: Tombs, Jul 6, 18:45:06