Toss off some pancetta

Slosh in three lugs of your fourth best Frankly Ordinary Olive Oil and two drops of your second best Filthy Slut Balsamic. Wiggle it around the f**king pan - go on, shake them hips, lovely, you little tiger! - then grate your f**king wolf into the pan, giving it a good old toss as you go. No not one of those tiny f**king saut? pans you f**king numpty, you'll never get it all in. Muppet. Jesus. Anyway, f**king throw it all around, squash some f**king garlic between your toes and dump that in there with some unicorn piss, a fairy's wings, the middle eye of a three-eyed newt, seventeen four-leaf clovers, a phoenix egg and the axle grease off of a First Great Western train that wasn't f**king late. The rest you'll find but that last one can be a c**t to get hold of. Simmer for two months then add three gallons of sump oil, sit back and wait for America to invade it and bring freedom and democracy to the f**ker.

Posted By: Jamie Oliver, Jul 19, 10:52:29