SCH needs his bumps felt

if spunking ?13m on a Ukrainian attacking midfielder is his go-to plan.

I cannot think of a single Ukrainian who's done anything in the Prem. Without even seeing this cat play I'm prediciting hands on hips after misplaced passes, wandering around when we don't have the ball, mysterious injuries aots requiring trips back to the motherland, incidents in kebab shops on Magdalene St every couple of weekends, appalling fashionwear, bizarre twitter tirades in pseudo gangsta/english/ukrainian hybrid language, some kind of photoshoot dressed as a Soviet submariner at Wroxham boat hire, a painfully thin blonde and young wag in tow getting upskirt photo'd getting out of a cab on timberhill, Bradley Johnson having to show him where to stand on corners, free kicks either nestling in the stanchion or hotel roof...in short we'd be signing Arshavins delinquent kid brother

more sweeping racist generalisations this time tomorrow.

Posted By: MIKEWALKER, Jul 11, 09:47:48