True story

I used to go out with this bird, I worshiped her every move, everything she did was perfect. I knew I was batting well above my average and I refused to listen when people said she would one day leave me.

Well one day she did leave me, I was devastated, I went through the whole gambit of emotion. Grief, anger, denial.
I thought I would never get over it and my life would rapidly go down hill.

But remarkably I`ve now pulled another bird, my life has been turned round and the future looks very rosy indeed. She is also better looking and I can f**kin understand what she is saying.

It turned out my ex thought she had left me for a richer bloke but it turns out that he was up to his eyeball in debt. He had to sell his home and furnishings. They now live in a caravan just outside Skegness.

Ring any bells?

Oh and not one mention of he who shall not be mentioned

Posted By: emmaroyds, Jun 27, 17:27:25