*stalker alert*

A Sheffield man was freed by armed police last night after a tense stand off with his kidnappper. Matthew Bay, who gave his age as 35, no 33, hang on I meant 34, a full time nerd, managed to loosen his bonds by using a sharpened pen from his large collection and get to a window where he was dragged to safety. Bay said that he had stopped his ridiculous imitation of a car to offer assistance to an elderly gentleman who had appeared lost and confused, only for the man to turn upon him, gag him with used keks and imprison him in the tiny boot of his own "car". Bay described his ordeal as having left him literally shaking with rage and said that his captor had regularly shouted random phrases such as "basket weaving", "this country" and "what's that got to do with anything"

The suspected kidnapper was last night not assisting police at all

Posted By: Old Git, Sep 23, 13:49:23