Ok, now I've had a chance to sit down, here's my review of the Norwich/Bar?a extravaganza!

Well it started Monday morning with me sitting at home doing me breakfast. I was a bit bored and had nothing planned for the day except to get my frick together for my flight the next day to Barcelona. Was just doing a bit of wrath when I noticed Selwyn offering a ticket for the match. I had no interest whatsoever in the game, I wasn't even going to watch it on TV after the amount of crap I've watched from them this season. I don't know why but something was drawing me to that ticket. I couldn't believe I was seriously considering it, but I did. I checked the train times and cost. I noticed the train would bring me into Norwich at 1813. It was too perfect so I booked it. Despite it costing me ?102 and the journey being 5 hrs 30mins, which normally I would've swerved, I booked it. Then changed my flight for the next day from Gatwick instead of Liverpool.

Now at this point it didn't even occur to me that we're s**t and probably won't do anything but lose. The nagging inside me just kept saying, "you're gonna f**king love this right off!" So I sorted my accommodation, packed my bag and set off to get my train into Liverpool and then onto Norwich.

Not much happened really. I f**king hate trains. IED is wrong, they are s**t. Had this weird German woman come sit beside me from Manchester to Sheffield. She just kept looking at what i was doing on my iphone the whole time. I think she found it a bit odd some of the posts on here that i was reading. Serve her right for looking. After Sheffield it was Chesterfield. Mental place that. Saw Chesterfield College which looked like a hell hole. It looking like the sort of place that mass produces crap drugs and sells them to little boys. Also noticed a well bent up church. It was a bit weird and it freaked me out a bit. I'd been drinking this s**t Fosters on the train and I wasn't sure if it was just me hallucinating from whatever s**te was in those cans. Still after we left I managed to wing a pack of 4 cheap. Got to Nottingham and this huge bird (not just your standard fat bird, she was whale like) and her little boyfriend got on and sat opposite me. I nearly told her to sit up. Her fat was spilling over the table and making me feel uncomfortable. What is it about little scrawny men, why do they always go for the biggest fattest thing they can find? weird. They sat there until Grantham where they then moved to the table across the aisle so they could sit opposite each other where they played cards with a deck with pictures of naked men on. I didn't want to be seeing them, wang out and all. Peterborough next where they got off. A group of Geordies got on and sat on that table and 3 of them near me. I got the impression that they were working on the rigs and flying out from Yarmouth the next day. They were all looking forward to watching their game against Pompey in a pub in Norwich. I told them about our game was on sky and it would be on in most pubs in Norwich and they went a bit quiet for 5mins. Still they were good blokes and had a bit of friendly banter all the way to Norwich.

Over the journey I counted how many league grounds I could see and how many we'll go to next season. The list of grounds I saw was: Everton, Liverpool, Man Utd, Man City, Stockport, Sheffield Utd, Chesterfield Utd, Notts Forest, Notts County, Peterborough Utd. So that'll be a big fat 1 then. Stockport, nice.

So, arrived in Norwich with nothing but my bag and deep vein thrombosis from the journey. Ditched my bag at my digs and went to Lloyds in search of selwyn. It looked busy in there but i didn't stop long. Got my ticket and ran up to the kings. Nearly f**ked over running up jimmy hill in the rain but made it. Met with loj, Mbk and Garry Brooke and a group and a few others. Got told I was a mad c**t and Garry Brooke was on a wind up about me sounding scouse. Still, at least I wasn't wearing that jacket that he had on. If he'd been standing outside a school the police would've been called. So bit of drinking and a catch up with everyone and the nerves were well and truly kicking in.

We headed down towards the ground about half seven. We missed player of the season, quite ironic as most of the players have been missing this season. The game had just got underway as we got in. The first half overall wasn't great. The players gave it a bit of a go but for a team fighting for their lives, they didn't do enough for me. To many stray passes, nothing really in midfield. Only a great block from Shacks kept the score even. Carney was utter dogs**te and i'll waste no more words on him. The fans were loud and proud, did very well but frustration was creeping in. Half time and it wasn't looking great but if they played as they were then a draw was on the cards. Much to everyone's amusement Delia got the ?500 prize in the half time draw. Then the second half began, well for Reading it did. We were terrible, a complete lack of effort from all but a couple of players. The most annoying part was that they actually looked like they couldn't give a f**k. The referee was very poor, one decision in particular stuck in my mind. Down by the corner of the Barclay / South stand when the Reading player got the cross in after being fowled and then the ref blowed up and gave a free kick was ridiculous. You can't play the advantage like that and then give the free kick! But I'm not going to blame the ref because we were so poor that it didn't matter anyway. The goals were almost identical and you could see them coming. Very frustrating game. We left on 87mins. The first time I've ever left a game early but there was no way I was staying for the lap of dishonour.

Back to the Kings it was. Very subdued and quiet. loj's brother looked devastated when he came in. I thought he was going to cry. Then we were joined by Strap on sally, jafski, Arizona Bay and Mrs A.B. Mbk and I had a pint of guiness each in which the lad at the bar had written 2-0 in the head of the beer. The cheeky c**t. So we stayed for a while, drank more beer until closing time where we went our separate ways. I went back to the hotel.

Then in the morning I was up at 7, had a little wander around the city centre to see what had changed in the last 2-3 years since I did a visit. Then off to FCR to see if I could find someone to talk to and get an apology for the money i'd wasted on the trip. Left a message with the receptionist so whether I'll hear anything back or not I don't know.

Off to the train station to get my train to London for my flight to Barcelona. Had this annoying c**t sat near me who decided to phone everyone, I mean everyone to tell them that he'd just passed his driving test. I heard the same conversation, word for word 6 times in a row. All the way from Norwich to Scumland. "Alright boi, just passed my driving test, yeah, yeah, yeah, oonly got 5 minors, thats good intut, yeah, yeah, yeah....pause..... yeah, right boi I better go, gotta foon ....insert name here...... knob head. After he got off at scumland and the obligatory V signs were flicked at Portman rd I tried to sleep all the way to London. Didn't work, to much noise on a train. Made my way through London and on to Gatwick.

Forgot completely that the plane would be full of Chelski fans. It was. I'm not a massive fan of Londoners. wherever they go they crowd and are loud and obnoxious. The departure lounge was god awful full of them dressed in blue, striding round with their chests stuck out. It was a testosterone fest, full of these alpha males, fack this, fack that, fack,fack fack. It reminded me of the sketch Russell Brand did on his first DVD, watch it and you'll see. Got on the plane for the 2hr flight got up in the air and I thought I'll try and sleep again. Fack, Fack, Fack, apples and pears, apples and pairs, fack, fack, fack. No chance. Then half hour in to the flight they start singing Chelski songs. 2 f**king hours of that.

Got off the plane where my mate Xevi was there to meet me. We dropped my bag off and then went for a few pre match beers before going to the ground about 15mins before kick off. We were just behind the south goal (the end Bar?a attacked first) Good noise in the Camp Nou, Chelski fans away in the heavens to our right were quiet but you wouldn't have heard them anyway were they were. Some lunatic catalan nearly kept taking my head off when he was waving his big f**k off Bar?a flag everytime they got close to goal. It was good though. The atmosphere was brilliant and I came out deaf from all the whistles. I felt the ref was poor and didn't control the game very well, especially towards the end of the first half when Drogba and Alaves were having their spat. It was difficult to see what happened from were we were and I've not seen the tv coverage. It was embarrassing in the end though when Alaves kept falling over, Drogba was just as bad though. Ballack should've walked as should Alex and Alaves too. Shame for Marquez to get the injury as he's been immense this season. Messi was kept relatively quiet but had been ganged up on. This working in Bar?a's favour as it allowed Iniesta more time on the ball. He was the man of the match for me.It appeared the Chelsea plan of get 11 men behind the ball and foul Barca worked.

So after the game we head back into the city for more beer. Saw Chelski fans fighting in Pla?a de Catalunya so we went drinking in the Nou Rambla in the Ravall. Caught up with a load of mates there. Stayed there fairly late and then off to bed.

The journey home the next day was uneventful really. I slept pretty much the whole way home. Overall it was a good trip apart from the footy!

Posted By: NCFC4life, Apr 30, 10:28:16