Don't get me started on the number 11 shirt

Could we get the two number ones in correct alignment on the back?

Well, no we couldn't. Took me and my gaffer Tezza ages ironing the transfer on and each time it was slightly off centre. I ended up contacting my union about it due to work-related stress and the risk of repetitive strain injury, and I've got an undertaking that in future I get a ten minute break every two hours when on ironing duty.

Turns out the problem was that each time, rather than rely on a UEFA-qualified assistant kit care professional like myself, the gaffer was letting Peter Mendham line the numbers up, and of course he was too pissed to get them straight. As soon as I found out I made him drive home and leave it to us experts.

Still it's done now but honestly what a nightmare. Assistant Kit Managing is a hard path to follow and weaker men might have thrown the towel in after that. But being only the assistant I'd have had to fish the towel out again afterwards, so what would have been the point?

Posted By: Assistant Kit Man on August 17th 2006 at 11:00:53

Message Thread

Something must be going on... (NCFC) - Dog, Aug 17, 10:51:30
- reto zeigler (n/m) (NCFC) - pants, Aug 17, 10:59:17
  - Simon Davies (NCFC) - Dog, Aug 17, 11:01:23
    - Leon Osman (n/m) (NCFC) - pants, Aug 17, 11:06:32
      - Dean Windass (n/m) (NCFC) - Arganth, Aug 17, 11:09:27
        
        Steven Warnock (n/m) (NCFC) - pants, Aug 17, 11:12:39
        
        Leonard Nimoy (n/m) (NCFC) - Partial Angler, Aug 17, 11:14:08
        
        David HasselHoff (n/m) (NCFC) - conker, Aug 17, 11:15:27
        
        Spike from press gang (n/m) (NCFC) - pants, Aug 17, 11:17:09
        
        He's not really American, so why did he pretend to be? (n/m) (NCFC) - yarmyyarmy, Aug 17, 11:22:13
        
        Andy Hughes isn't really a footballer but he continues to pretend to be (n/m) (NCFC) - conker, Aug 17, 11:26:20
        
        Ten of your English pence says he is a footballer... (n/m) (NCFC) - Arganth, Aug 17, 11:27:57
        
        So....you have talking money.... (n/m) (NCFC) - Partial Angler, Aug 17, 11:28:46
        
        Yeah, I sell them for a fiver each... (n/m) (NCFC) - Arganth, Aug 17, 11:31:54
        
        Cheap at half of the price (n/m) (NCFC) - conker, Aug 17, 11:35:13
        
        Exactly - I challenge anyone to find talking money for sale any cheaper... (n/m) (NCFC) - Arganth, Aug 17, 11:38:33
        
        Dr Simon Scharma (n/m) (NCFC) - Arganth, Aug 17, 11:20:49
        
        John Travolta (n/m) (NCFC) - conker, Aug 17, 11:22:03
        
        Dickson's cock green? (n/m) (NCFC) - pants, Aug 17, 11:25:26
        
        Is it really necessary to bring that up? (NCFC) - Assistant Kit Man, Aug 17, 11:26:47
- There will be a signing before the deadline (NCFC) - Hull Canary, Aug 17, 10:54:54
  - Don't get me started on the number 11 shirt (NCFC) - Assistant Kit Man, Aug 17, 11:00:53
    - did you also do Green's WHU shirt then? (NCFC) - Hull Canary, Aug 17, 11:04:04
  - And the fact that someone is sponsoring the shirt number means we'll sign someone? (NCFC) - Dog, Aug 17, 10:56:17
    - Maybe the sponsor could wear it on matchdays (n/m) (NCFC) - duke of york, Aug 17, 10:58:32
    - They'll have to... even if it's a dodgy full-back (NCFC) - Hull Canary, Aug 17, 10:58:31
- they're holding the front page (NCFC) - camcan, Aug 17, 10:52:44
  - As 96.6% passed he'll have to be really fucking thick to fail! (NCFC) - duke of york, Aug 17, 10:56:20
    - If you took a random sample of 18 year olds and asked them to (NCFC) - Partial Angler, Aug 17, 11:02:44
      - I still struggle with the first. (NCFC) - InTheAbsenceOfAHorse, Aug 17, 11:03:34
    - Actually he might not have to... (NCFC) - Hull Canary, Aug 17, 11:00:17
    - A Levels Out? Blimey... (NCFC) - Martin Peters, Aug 17, 10:59:40
      - Your lawn cutting empire? (NCFC) - InTheAbsenceOfAHorse, Aug 17, 11:00:34
        
        Minge Topiary (n/m) (NCFC) - pants, Aug 17, 11:08:17
  - More on my far more important decision...... (NCFC) - InTheAbsenceOfAHorse, Aug 17, 10:54:19
    - While you be riding said horse on the Peaks? (n/m) (NCFC) - duke of york, Aug 17, 10:56:58
      - No...... (NCFC) - InTheAbsenceOfAHorse, Aug 17, 10:59:44
  - But what about the back page? (NCFC) - Dog, Aug 17, 10:54:11
  - They want to watch they don't wear out the 'd' key on thier typewriters. (n/m) (NCFC) - Arizona Bay, Aug 17, 10:53:51

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