LAST WEEK WAS MY BIRTHDAY

AND I DIDN'T FEEL VERY WELL WAKING UP THAT
MORNING.

I WENT DOWNSTAIRS FOR BREAKFAST HOPING MY WIFE WOULD BE PLEASANT AND SAY,
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!", AND POSSIBLY HAVE A PRESENT FOR ME.

AS IT TURNED OUT, SHE BARELY SAID GOOD MORNING, LET ALONE "HAPPY BIRTHDAY."

I THOUGHT... WELL, THAT'S MARRIAGE FOR YOU, BUT THE KIDS WILL REMEMBER.

MY KIDS CAME INTO BREAKFAST AND DIDN'T SAY A WORD. SO WHEN I LEFT FOR THE
OFFICE, I WAS FEELING PRETTY LOW AND SOMEWHAT DESPONDENT.

AS I WALKED INTO MY OFFICE, MY SECRETARY JANE SAID, "GOOD
MORNING, BOSS, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

IT FELT A LITTLE BETTER THAT AT LEAST SOMEONE HAD REMEMBERED.

I WORKED UNTIL ONE O'CLOCK AND THEN JANE KNOCKED ON MY DOOR AND SAID, "YOU
KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY OUTSIDE, AND IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY, LET'S GO
OUT TO LUNCH, JUST YOU AND ME."

I SAID, "THANKS JANE, THAT'S THE GREATEST THING I'VE HEARD ALL DAY. LET'S
GO!"

WE WENT TO LUNCH. BUT WE DIDN'T GO WHERE WE NORMALLY WOULD GO.

WE DINED INSTEAD AT A LITTLE PLACE WITH A PRIVATE TABLE. WE HAD TWO MARTINIS
EACH AND I ENJOYED THE MEAL TREMENDOUSLY ON THE WAY BACK TO THE OFFICE, JANE
SAID,

"YOU KNOW, IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY... WE DON'T
NEED TO GO BACK TO THE OFFICE, DO WE?"

I RESPONDED, "I GUESS NOT. WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN MIND?"

SHE SAID, "LET'S GO TO MY APARTMENT."

AFTER ARRIVING AT HER APARTMENT JANE TURNED TO ME AND SAID,"BOSS, IF YOU
DON'T MIND, I'M GOING TO STEP INTO THE BEDROOM FOR A MOMENT. I'LL BE RIGHT
BACK."

"OK." I NERVOUSLY REPLIED.

SHE WENT INTO THE BEDROOM AND, AFTER A COUPLE OF MINUTES, SHE CAME OUT
CARRYING A HUGE BIRTHDAY CAKE... FOLLOWED BY MY WIFE, KIDS, AND DOZENS OF MY
FRIENDS AND CO-WORKERS, ALL SINGING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY".

AND I JUST SAT THERE...

ON THE COUCH...

NAKED!!!!!

Posted By: pants on November 3rd 2005 at 17:17:13

Message Thread

LAST WEEK WAS MY BIRTHDAY (General Chat) - pants, Nov 3, 17:17:13
- Eh? (General Chat) - Ashton4England, Nov 3, 17:24:58
  - it was actually quite funny (General Chat) - SCC 26, Nov 3, 17:43:34
  - ???? (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Nov 3, 17:25:26
    - You dont get it either? Why did you bother posting it then (n/m) (General Chat) - Ashton4England, Nov 3, 17:25:55
      - ???? (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Nov 3, 17:26:27
        
        Oh sorry, is this your new preteen way to reply to me? (General Chat) - Ashton4England, Nov 3, 17:28:02
        
        you are wrong this time (n/m) (General Chat) - SCC 26, Nov 3, 17:43:57
        
        ???? (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Nov 3, 17:28:47
- Man walks into a bar. (General Chat) - Partial Angler, Nov 3, 17:23:52
  - What's brown and sticky? (General Chat) - Partial Angler, Nov 3, 17:24:00
    - What's green and hairy and goes up and down? (General Chat) - Partial Angler, Nov 3, 17:24:15
      - Robert Green (General Chat) - Riverking, Nov 3, 17:29:08
      - What's red and sits in the corner? (General Chat) - Partial Angler, Nov 3, 17:24:28
        
        What's yellow and eats nuts? (General Chat) - Partial Angler, Nov 3, 17:24:57
        
        What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? (General Chat) - Partial Angler, Nov 3, 17:25:26
        
        Leon's missus walks into a bar. Damien Francis turns to her and says (General Chat) - Partial Angler, Nov 3, 17:26:33
        
        lol (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Nov 3, 17:27:06
        
        VD is nothing to clap about (n/m) (General Chat) - pants, Nov 3, 17:26:01
        
        What do you call a man witha seagull on his head (General Chat) - romayellow, Nov 3, 17:25:57
- There's a better on like that (General Chat) - Yellow Jersey, Nov 3, 17:23:22
- Oh... (General Chat) - Fierce Panda, Nov 3, 17:22:05

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