A view on Lambert from yesterday's Fiver

When Ambitious Paul left Norwich last summer he did so because he wanted to be a big player, at a big club with big traditions, trading big blows with the big boys in the biggest, bestest league in the world. But the Valencia job had just gone. So he took over at Aston Villa instead, a club who had just sacked a manager in Alex McLeish ? who was fast becoming as irrelevant as Kerry Katona and almost as unpopular as, say, Nick Clegg.

So he would have to go some to make the Villa Park natives restless. Which is exactly what he has done, taking Villa to the depths with some truly insipid displays, of which arguably the worst ? and there is some stiff competition here readers ? came at Valley Parade in the first leg of the Fizzy Cup semi-finals, in which League Two Bradford City made Villa's defence look about as functional as Weird Uncle Fiver after a three-day sub-Kavos session in Skegness. So kudos to you Ambitious Paul.

But perhaps it is all part of his masterplan to transform Villa from grand-old-down-on-their-luck-shambling-giants into Plucky Minnows. Because, after all, Ambitious Paul has form in making Plucky Minnows punch above their weight. Livingston, Wycombe, Colchester, Norwich, erm ? you get the picture.
Anyway, the point is this: that Aston Villa head into tonight's second leg 3-1 down and calling on the Villa Park crowd to treat the match as if they are playing Barcelona in Big Cup. Ambitious Paul has even tried to do mind games by picking on Bradford's PA man ? a man of the cloth, no less ? and accusing him of "disrespecting" his side by suggesting the good folk of Bradford may want to think about booking accommodation in London. An entirely reasonable suggestion, given Villa's sorry showing last time out.
"You don't [count your chickens] ? football's got a great habit of kicking you somewhere," said Ambitious Paul, polishing his steel toe caps. "It's disrespectful to do that. We'll see what happens after the game. It was their home game. But it's disrespectful to do that to other teams."

For his part, the vicar of Heworth Christ Church in York, Paul Deo, has done his best to make sure Bradford still carry the underdog tag into the tie despite Plucky Villa's best efforts to snatch it from them. "What I said was that, though it was only 'half-time' in the semi-final tie and it was far from over, Bradford fans 'could be forgiven for having a look at hotel rooms in London'. It was all simply part of the feeling of that amazing sense of almost unbelievable celebration ? little Bradford City actually have the chance to play at Wembley in a major final." And Plucky Villa too.

Posted By: KentonCanary on January 23rd 2013 at 09:36:45

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