I think the designation of toilets is just wrong, in general.

It shouldn't be Men in one and Women in another, it should be civilised, sanitary people in one, and rank f**king beast-people in the other. Or, rank f**king beast-people in one, and the rest of us in another.

I know it's easy to defer to gender stereotypes and say, well Matt, that's just the same as Men in one and Women in the other, but it isn't, it really isn't.

To evidence this I'd like to cite the firm which Mrs B works for. They have someone there, a woman we have to presume, as this occurs in the women's lavatories, who habitually smears s**t up the wall of the cubicles. Seriously. They've never got to the, ahem, bottom of it, but it's still happening. They all *know* who it is, of course, just like we all know that Ryan Giggs, Gareth Barry and/or Paul Scholes have had their lawyers busy the last few months.

It's not just s**t up the cubicles. Used sanitary products have been left in the lavatories undisposed of. Just left there on the floor of the cubicle.

So it clearly isn't "all men are just monsters, and all women are delicate clean rose-smelling angels", not at all. Women can be monsters too.

So what I propose is this: every so often, after we reach our maturity, we have to go for a lavatory usage inspection. This would probably be administered and co-ordinated by the Ministry for Knowing Who The Cunts Are. We go to thier offices, visit the toilets, and this can all be done in a civilised way, do our business and leave. The lavatories are then inspected, and if we've been well brought up, we get a new stamp on our "Is Not A Filth Beast Licence". Those failing the test get a large black cross drawn over their foreheads or something.

Thereafter access to toilets is done via inspection of out Lavatorial Usage Licences.

I've thought about this a little too long.

Posted By: Arizona Bay on May 16th 2011 at 16:37:14

Message Thread

Separate longdrops for men and women at Latitude this year. (n/m) (General Chat) - malkybarkid, May 16, 16:00:25
- That means you wont be able to see reflections of mary's. (General Chat) - CB41, May 16, 16:14:02
  - "Reflections of Marys" - wunt that a song by Status Quoo? (n/m) (General Chat) - CB41, May 16, 16:15:51
    - Pictures of Lily by the Who, Shirley? (General Chat) - APB, May 16, 16:38:15
      - .... (General Chat) - CB41, May 16, 16:48:16
        
        I know. It just sounded ruder to me. (n/m) (General Chat) - APB, May 16, 17:04:28
- Outrageous (General Chat) - yarmyyarmy, May 16, 16:11:31
  - Gender-specific shitters. (n/m) (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, May 16, 16:14:26
    - That this is seen as a novelty confirms my suspicions about Latitude (General Chat) - yarmyyarmy, May 16, 16:18:57
      - I think the designation of toilets is just wrong, in general. (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, May 16, 16:37:14
        
        yep similar story at my old workplace (n/m) (General Chat) - Brandonio, May 16, 17:05:09
        
        Flawed. They dirty ones could just up teir game at the ministry, get their stamp and then (General Chat) - jafski, May 16, 16:41:44
        
        Did you reaally mean "snatch" squads???? (n/m) (General Chat) - CB41, May 16, 16:52:24
        
        Yes but 'snatch' as in 'sprit away quickly' not as in 'clunge'. (n/m) (General Chat) - jafski, May 16, 16:53:29
        
        sprit away quickly. That's good Norfolk that is. (n/m) (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, May 16, 16:57:02
        
        Well, actually, I'm more in your camp that I admitted in that first post. (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, May 16, 16:47:40
        
        ^^^ y'see this (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, May 16, 16:58:57
        
        I like Blunket, he's a kushtie geeza (n/m) (General Chat) - CB41, May 16, 17:01:46
        
        apart from him being a dodgy, reactionary, two-timing, hypocritical cunt (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, May 16, 17:31:12
        
        "two-timing hypocritical c**t" (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, May 16, 17:35:02
        
        oh come now Tricky, surely you remember him and his suing for DNA tests for his love-child (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, May 16, 17:48:54
        
        my post was biting satire. (n/m) (General Chat) - Tricky Hawes, May 16, 17:52:29
        
        i think my reply had more teeth... (General Chat) - Ralf Scrampton, May 16, 17:56:41
        
        Yes, that and secret cubiclecams. A mechanism can be placed in the toilet itself to obtain (General Chat) - jafski, May 16, 16:52:03
  - Separate cludgies. (General Chat) - malkybarkid, May 16, 16:13:38
    - Like that live pic of Joss Stone (google image, joss stone, turn safe thing off, page 14) (General Chat) - pants, May 16, 17:05:56
    - OMG (n/m) (General Chat) - Huge 5mal1, May 16, 16:16:47
    - Ah, it's some kind of toilet. (n/m) (General Chat) - yarmyyarmy, May 16, 16:15:16
      - yeah toilet cubicles in the open air (door, sides, no roof) with a huge cesspit (General Chat) - Brandonio, May 16, 17:09:08
    - ^^^ Yes ^^^^ (n/m) (General Chat) - CB41, May 16, 16:15:02
- Your holidays are a bit bent up recently (General Chat) - pants, May 16, 16:03:52
  - From our hotel roof... (General Chat) - malkybarkid, May 16, 16:11:14
    - I remember you asking about going there (General Chat) - pants, May 16, 16:15:15
      - Marrakesh, London, New York, Madrid, Sharm el-Sheikh, Bangkok... could happen anywhere. (General Chat) - malkybarkid, May 16, 16:18:17
    - LG get everywhere don't they? (n/m) (General Chat) - Arizona Bay, May 16, 16:11:45
      - .... (General Chat) - pants, May 16, 16:17:35

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